vail-kagami: Between (Jack/Ten) [G]

[vail-kagami.livejournal.com]

Title: Between
Author: vail_kagami 
Challenge: alien
Rating: G
Spoilers/warnings: None
Summary: After being reunited with the Doctor, Jack grows up, every time.
Note: Unbetaed, due to me being very much internetless for the rest of the month.

There was a fantasy Jack indulged every once in a while, when he saw the Doctor after a long absence. Absence made the heart grow fonder, they said – in Jack’s case that was not true. He got caught up in his own life, to the point where felt like he could go in this life forever and the Doctor was but a distant memory. And then he would see him again, and travel with him, and every day he watched the charismatic Time Lord, he would remember how fascinating he was. Every time he saw him save a world, or dance across the console of his TARDIS, or bounce across the surface of a new planet, Jack would fall in love anew. Until he couldn’t imagine leaving ever again.

Of course, he always did.

It was the time in between he cherished. It was the time in between too, that cured him of the little fantasy he liked to indulge, every now and then, when he hadn’t seen the Doctor in ages.

The Doctor would show up, and Jack would remember all of a sudden the very adolescent, very fierce crush he had on him. And like a teenager he would lie awake, in his first night back in the TARDIS, and imagine leaving his bed. In his fantasy he walked through the ship until he found the Doctor, and he would grab the surprised Time Lord, and pin him against the wall, and he would kiss him. The Doctor of his fantasy would be stunned at first, but he would get over his surprise and return Jack’s kiss, would wrap his arms around Jack’s neck, and Jack would pick him up and carry him and his dream to the bedroom.

And every time he would return to reality with the determination to make this dream come true before his time with the Doctor was over.

But with each passing day, with each day of watching the Doctor save planets and kittens, walk on air and dive in danger and love it, his determination wavered. Because there was something about the Doctor that was a little bit off, a little bit beyond his reach and the range of his vision.  While the smiles and the anger and the passion were real, they served to hide the alien inside, the person beyond Jack’s understanding. And he could not feel rejected by the Doctor never truly being himself with Jack around, for the glimpses he caught between the folds made him feel lost; he was in way over his head.

It was the glimpses that made him let go of his dream, over an over again. It was the glimpses that fascinated him, that made him shiver, that made him leave. The process was the same every time: Jack let go of the Doctor, Jack reunited with the Doctor and fell for him again, nurturing his childish crush until he grew up and left to be with someone who lived in the same world as him. The circle repeated endlessly, and Jack was satisfied at every point of it. He let go only when he was ready.

He wanted the Doctor, always, but in between the coming and the going he learned to overcome his desire, let go of the alien and be satisfied with the part of the Doctor he could reach and take with him when he left.

 

 

August 24, 2009

 

Comments

[ausmac.livejournal.com]

That's wondrous. How do you do that? How do you capture such a precise essence of relationship and personality and make it ring so true?

Don't need to answer: because you write so bloody good.

*sigh*

[vail-kagami.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much! I didn't think it was any good, so I'm relieved you like it.

[talkingtothesky]

^^^ what she said. :D

[vail-kagami.livejournal.com]

Thanks to you too!

[teastainedbird.livejournal.com]

Wow, you capture their relationship so amazingly. Loved it.

[vail-kagami.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I'm glad it worked this way.

[yoshiyuki-est.livejournal.com]

I completely agree with ausmac. You captured their relationship simply and beautifully. Thanks for sharing!

[vail-kagami.livejournal.com]

Thanks for commenting. I'm glad you liked it.
Oh, hey, lovely icon!

[nightrider101.livejournal.com]

This was fantastic and probably one of the most realistic interpretations of their relationship that I've ever read.

Jack's mature here, even when he's going through his crush stage. He knows it's just that.

The circle repeated endlessly, and Jack was satisfied at every point of it. He let go only when he was ready.

I loved that. Yes, I really like Jack here, and your descriptions of the Doctor.

Great job as always!

[vail-kagami.livejournal.com]

Late reply is late. Thanks for the comment, I'm glad you like it. I didn't. But what else is new? :P

[darthhellokitty.livejournal.com]

I love this so much. It is so totally real - that's my Jack, and that's my Doctor, who isn't quite so human as he looks.

[vail-kagami.livejournal.com]

Ah, yes. That. Thank you!

[shinodabear.livejournal.com]

This is simply perfect. This is my Ten/Jack. An endless cycle/circle of partings and meetings, with a range of emotions and maturities. Ugh. I love it, especially the bit about Jack taking a piece of the Doctor with him. That works both ways, companions holding on to what they can, and the Doctor taking in a bit of his companions, as well.

[(Anonymous)]

This is lovely, and the picture of the Doctor's otherness rightly chilling.

Have you stopped writing Whofic for the most part? Your Star Trek stuff is excellent and obviously you ought to be writing whatever you want to, but I'd hate to see you leave Who behind. I've been hoping to learn the story that follows "Confined Spaces" ever since you finished that. Don't mean to nag; it's none of my business, really.

[vail-kagami.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the comment!

Don't worry, I'm not leaving DW behind. The fandom is still very dear to me. But at the moment my attention is devided between ST, DW and Merlin, and it's nice to venture into other fandoms a bit.
I still plan to write that sequel, but it's going to be long, and with the other ongoing projects I have, I don't want to do them all at once and have months of waiting time between each chapter.

[(Anonymous)]

Well,of course you don't want to do that, or divide up your writing energy among too many projects. I'm just very, very happy to know you will still be writing Who, as I think your stuff is amazing.

[rrr-nightingale.livejournal.com]

The final is beautiful, just as the whole text is. I like how you write about the complex relations between the Doctor and Jack. I absolutely love this pairing, and still I feel there is something odd in it, some reason why it can't work out properly. And you put it so that I do believe in your version :)

[vail-kagami.livejournal.com]

Thanks!
My relationship with this pairing is a little difficult, actually. I still enjoy it in fanfics and like writing about it, but I don't really believe in it in canon anymore, not even from Jack's side. (I used to.)

[rrr-nightingale.livejournal.com]

Well... I agree that it is hard to believe in this pairing in canon now, but I think their relations have been changing during the series, and as long as they both have a lot of time, anything might happen%) (even though it is not likely...)
Maybe I like to hope so) Of course, there is always reading fanfiction about them, and it is very interesting. They are just too cool, and the pairing is amazing because of their difference.