Erya (![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png)
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wintercompanion2008-05-22 02:55 pm
eryaforsthye.livejournal.com) wrote in wintercompanion2008-05-22 02:55 pm
eryaforsthye: The Tale of the Prince and the Mockingbird (Nine/Jack, Ten/Jack) [G]
My very first entry in this wonderful community!
Dedicated to my wonderful beta![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
quazonic and to sarkywoman for inspiration and encouragement, with many thanks also to torn_eledhwen for suggesting a beautiful new geographical nomenclature. :)
Thank you, all of you! :D
Title: The Tale of the Prince and the Mockingbird
Author:eryaforsthye
Challenge: Myth
Pairing: Nine/Jack, Ten/Jack
Rating: G
Spoilers: Allusions to The Empty Child, The Doctor Dances, Parting of the Ways, Utopia, The Sound of Drums, Last of the Time Lords and the first series of Torchwood.
Summary: Listen, my children, to a tale on this winter's eve. A tale of pain, of love, and of redemption. This is a tale of a human man and the choices the gods placed upon him, of the decisions any man may make to become a god, or a devil. Listen well.
There was once a Princeling, they say, cruel and handsome as fiery brimstone or a winter's day, black was his heart and dark was his soul but he could, it was rumoured, steal a mind with a smile.
He would dance, they say, through forests and glens, taking all he desired with the devil’s own grin.
He jeered at all and bowed to none, for his pride was greater than any could o’ercome.
And he was strong, they say, as a thousand men, a warrior once, a warrior always, with sword at his side and cloak a-swirling, merciless and fierce; he killed all those against him with nary a pause.
An invincible creature with a god’s own capriciousness, and a god’s own gifts.
Beauty and strength, pride and courage, all were his given by the stars, but a price was to be paid and that was his heart.
Cold as ice, dead to the ways of the kind, he scoffed at gentleness and sneered at love.
For all his charm he was surely a fool, for in his blindness he mocked his gods, as he played sophistry with worlds and the laws of men.
A mad man then, a demon true, to use all to his ends, with never a thought to his own.
For he laughed at death and death laughed back.
And the stars witnessed his crimes and frowned, and sent down an angel to cure his blight.
The Angel was dark, vengeful and fierce, with a glance so cold, as bleakest ice, and the Princeling took one glance and fell and fell.
He asked forgiveness, he did, for his crimes; he prayed to the gods and offered his life.
A fool once, at last learning; humility he gained and the stars softened their anger and bade him exist.
So, the Angel took him, with a glare and a grin, a Trickster now a-welcoming his newborn kin.
The Princeling rejoiced at this, his new life and determined to learn and learn well from his second chance.
And he was brave, he learnt, and good to be true. He saved Our People with smile and without price and this was good, he knew, for this was him.
But the stars alas! they had not with him done. They required his blood to seal his pact – his life for their love, they said - for they loved him now having seen him well - and they, in their wisdom, thought to keep him, forever and a day, in their service e’er to be bound.
So, they brought him to war, a warrior needed now, and watched a-grieving as he lost his love and was left all alone with death about him; they watched him weep.
And he remained all alone for an age and a half – alone and forever rendered apart from all else – a punishment fitting no more, his crimes forgiven and paid for in full.
And they watched him pray, pray to the gods and to his Angel of Mercy, as no-one answered; and so he lived and lived and lived with not one reprieve.
And they watched as he wandered, as he learnt doubt and pain and fear at long last, as his gods watched, distant and silent as things dead.
And they pitied him, for his sufferings were eternal and written now in time.
And they watched, their twinkling dimming as their Forever Man faded, as his soul grew darker and his heart colder once again.
For he was wounded in his mind, by pain and by grief, and he had none to cure him and none to brighten his life.
They watched him, consumed oftimes by hatred and by rage; they watched him hurl himself through javelin spike and sword alike, as he sought for death and prayed in vain.
And they would weep if they could, as at last he found purpose, a single goal to be his, for his Angel again to see; his only desire took a hold of his soul and he sat upon the pillar that he built in the Great Old Town of Caer Dydd, to await his newest god.
And he waited.
And he waited for six score years and more, until, one day the sound of the heavens called him, and, in bliss, he ran, the name of his god from his lips falling.
But his god was changed, a stranger left standing his place; a cold man, a cruel man, a Mockingbird who quoth “Wrong, wrong!” and wounded the Forever Man’s heart with twin sharp blades.
But the Mockingbird slowly softened and revealed his hearts twain, a-broken and a-bleeding from the touch of war and loss – hidden from all so cleverly, all save the Forever Man, who saw in this distant stranger his Angel and his God and who gave him then his allegiance afresh.
Allegiance soon tried and tested as a Devil took charge – a Demon Child, Lucifer’s twin, come to rain damnation and fire upon The People of Our Past.
But the Forever Man and the Angel stood strong once more and together they destroyed the Cruel One and smote him down twice-over, with violence, and with forgiveness.
For our Gods were as merciful as they were strong, and, together they saved all.
And though they parted ways that very day, one reaching for ventures new, the other for peace and normality returned, they knew in their matching hearts that they twain would meet again, for eternity was vast and their lives well long.
And they dance now, the Forever Man and his Angel, across the stars for forever and a day; and if you look closely up into the night sky you can see them smiling, if you but look to your right.
Smiling at last, for eternity and a day.
Dedicated to my wonderful beta
quazonic and to sarkywoman for inspiration and encouragement, with many thanks also to torn_eledhwen for suggesting a beautiful new geographical nomenclature. :)Thank you, all of you! :D
Title: The Tale of the Prince and the Mockingbird
Author:
eryaforsthyeChallenge: Myth
Pairing: Nine/Jack, Ten/Jack
Rating: G
Spoilers: Allusions to The Empty Child, The Doctor Dances, Parting of the Ways, Utopia, The Sound of Drums, Last of the Time Lords and the first series of Torchwood.
Summary: Listen, my children, to a tale on this winter's eve. A tale of pain, of love, and of redemption. This is a tale of a human man and the choices the gods placed upon him, of the decisions any man may make to become a god, or a devil. Listen well.
There was once a Princeling, they say, cruel and handsome as fiery brimstone or a winter's day, black was his heart and dark was his soul but he could, it was rumoured, steal a mind with a smile.
He would dance, they say, through forests and glens, taking all he desired with the devil’s own grin.
He jeered at all and bowed to none, for his pride was greater than any could o’ercome.
And he was strong, they say, as a thousand men, a warrior once, a warrior always, with sword at his side and cloak a-swirling, merciless and fierce; he killed all those against him with nary a pause.
An invincible creature with a god’s own capriciousness, and a god’s own gifts.
Beauty and strength, pride and courage, all were his given by the stars, but a price was to be paid and that was his heart.
Cold as ice, dead to the ways of the kind, he scoffed at gentleness and sneered at love.
For all his charm he was surely a fool, for in his blindness he mocked his gods, as he played sophistry with worlds and the laws of men.
A mad man then, a demon true, to use all to his ends, with never a thought to his own.
For he laughed at death and death laughed back.
And the stars witnessed his crimes and frowned, and sent down an angel to cure his blight.
The Angel was dark, vengeful and fierce, with a glance so cold, as bleakest ice, and the Princeling took one glance and fell and fell.
He asked forgiveness, he did, for his crimes; he prayed to the gods and offered his life.
A fool once, at last learning; humility he gained and the stars softened their anger and bade him exist.
So, the Angel took him, with a glare and a grin, a Trickster now a-welcoming his newborn kin.
The Princeling rejoiced at this, his new life and determined to learn and learn well from his second chance.
And he was brave, he learnt, and good to be true. He saved Our People with smile and without price and this was good, he knew, for this was him.
But the stars alas! they had not with him done. They required his blood to seal his pact – his life for their love, they said - for they loved him now having seen him well - and they, in their wisdom, thought to keep him, forever and a day, in their service e’er to be bound.
So, they brought him to war, a warrior needed now, and watched a-grieving as he lost his love and was left all alone with death about him; they watched him weep.
And he remained all alone for an age and a half – alone and forever rendered apart from all else – a punishment fitting no more, his crimes forgiven and paid for in full.
And they watched him pray, pray to the gods and to his Angel of Mercy, as no-one answered; and so he lived and lived and lived with not one reprieve.
And they watched as he wandered, as he learnt doubt and pain and fear at long last, as his gods watched, distant and silent as things dead.
And they pitied him, for his sufferings were eternal and written now in time.
And they watched, their twinkling dimming as their Forever Man faded, as his soul grew darker and his heart colder once again.
For he was wounded in his mind, by pain and by grief, and he had none to cure him and none to brighten his life.
They watched him, consumed oftimes by hatred and by rage; they watched him hurl himself through javelin spike and sword alike, as he sought for death and prayed in vain.
And they would weep if they could, as at last he found purpose, a single goal to be his, for his Angel again to see; his only desire took a hold of his soul and he sat upon the pillar that he built in the Great Old Town of Caer Dydd, to await his newest god.
And he waited.
And he waited for six score years and more, until, one day the sound of the heavens called him, and, in bliss, he ran, the name of his god from his lips falling.
But his god was changed, a stranger left standing his place; a cold man, a cruel man, a Mockingbird who quoth “Wrong, wrong!” and wounded the Forever Man’s heart with twin sharp blades.
But the Mockingbird slowly softened and revealed his hearts twain, a-broken and a-bleeding from the touch of war and loss – hidden from all so cleverly, all save the Forever Man, who saw in this distant stranger his Angel and his God and who gave him then his allegiance afresh.
Allegiance soon tried and tested as a Devil took charge – a Demon Child, Lucifer’s twin, come to rain damnation and fire upon The People of Our Past.
But the Forever Man and the Angel stood strong once more and together they destroyed the Cruel One and smote him down twice-over, with violence, and with forgiveness.
For our Gods were as merciful as they were strong, and, together they saved all.
And though they parted ways that very day, one reaching for ventures new, the other for peace and normality returned, they knew in their matching hearts that they twain would meet again, for eternity was vast and their lives well long.
And they dance now, the Forever Man and his Angel, across the stars for forever and a day; and if you look closely up into the night sky you can see them smiling, if you but look to your right.
Smiling at last, for eternity and a day.
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Mem'd quicker than a quick thing. Thank you so much for brightening the start of a long and dull day with this total treasure.
I'm aware I'm fan-girling, but I really don't care. It's brilliant.
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(Why can I *never* resist that one?) :P
Thank you so, so much! I was never completely sure about this one and was still quite a bit anxious about posting it even after
*dances*
*blushes at fangirling*
*dances happily*
Thank you for leaving me such a lovely, wonderful comment and for the mem! :D
I'm so very glad it worked for you. :D
Love,
Erya. :)
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Do which again? Another entry in this comm or another Tale? :P
*dances happily*
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OMG I JUST NOTICED I HAVE A DEDICATION AT THE TOP! *glomps you without shame*
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I'm really delighted you like it - it was actually inspired in some part by your own entry (which I loved). :D
Thank you so, so much for commenting and for helping me out with the basic rules in this comm! :D
*does joyful dance*
*beams happily*
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And I just noticed your edit! :P
*purrs happily*
*glomps you back*
:D
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It's truel beautifully told, this story, and sad because it is true yet with a happy ending. I just love it.
The Angel was dark, vengeful and fierce, with a glance so cold, as bleakest ice, and the Princeling took one glance and fell and fell.
= Perfect!
Terribly nice to see something from you again! I hope you can write for this comm more often now!
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(Anonymous) 2008-05-22 05:28 pm (UTC)(link)Tale of the Prince and the Mockingbird
Heartrendingly beautiful!
Well written! I love your style and prose.
Can I friend you?
Re: Tale of the Prince and the Mockingbird
I have some stories over at my writing journal under timeturner_tobi. . .
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I've always had a fondness for stories written like this -- fractured fairytales, if you will -- and after struggling with one of my own and giving me up, this has made me want to write again. :)
Love you loads,
Steph
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You have done a wonderful job!
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I think this is the kind of thing people mean when they describe a fic as 'pure poetry'. The descriptions ring so very painfully true for both Jack and the Doctor (both of versions of him), but the real power of it is in just how much it made me feel as I read.
Thank you for posting this. It really was a gorgeous read :-)
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Fantastic.
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For he laughed at death and death laughed back.
For this line alone, I love you to death.
The alliterative response
The Angel was dark, vengeful and fierce, with a glance so cold, as bleakest ice, and the Princeling took one glance and fell and fell.
That line was perfect. :)
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May I make a tiny suggestion? You've got "Great Old Town of Car Diff". How about going back to the original Welsh, which is still used for Cardiff, Caerdydd? It splits as Caer Dydd (according to Wikipedia the "dydd" is either a mutation of "Taff", the city's river, or connected with a Roman bloke called Aulus Didius Gallus; in any case caer means castle). "Great Old Town of Caer Dydd" just has a more mythical ring to half-Welsh me! :)
no subject
Thank you!
*beams*
*blushes*
"Great Old Town of Caer Dydd" just has a more mythical ring to half-Welsh me!
That's a brilliant suggestion! Thank you! You're right - that does have a lovely ring to it. :)
*changes gleefully*
*credits you*
Thank you so much for the lovely comment and wonderful suggestion!
~ Erya. :)
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*Grins*
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So beautiful, and I loved the switches between the ways they were seen - Angel, God, Mockingbird etc.
Just wow. ^_^