megans_writing: Jack Sees God (10/Jack) [PG-13 *to be safe*]

[mahmfic.livejournal.com]

Title: Jack Sees God
Author: megans_writing
Challenge: 2010 Doctor/Jack Fest
Prompt used: I go back to the house for a book by Billy Collins
Rating: PG-13 (just to be safe, but more likely PG)
Spoilers/warnings: Spoilers for Doctor Who's Turn Left (and I supposed The Sontaran Stragem and The Poison Sky). Slash. Angst. Character Death. Implied Jack/Ianto
Summary: No regrets, right? That's what the Doctor had always said.
Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who or Torchwood.
Notes: I'd like to thank my beta, runriggers.


Jack has taken a step back for once. He's observing his marvelous team: Gwen, Owen, Tosh and Ianto surprise him with their results, even though he knows he should have let them grow before now, because their actions is going to get them all killed. But he's always had a death wish.

No regrets, right?

That's what the Doctor had always said. Jack wonders if his lover had enough time to think of regrets when he died. The Immortal clenched his fists. Why had the Doctor been so stupid? After that year with the Master, the Doctor should have been more careful, less vengeful.

He can feel his face reddening, and he bites his tongue, fearing that tears will fall. He can't let his team down, not now. Gwen is screaming at the Sontaran, referring him as Mr. Potato Head. Jack wants to step in, be charming so they all won't have to die because of this damn kid and the Sontarans.

But he won't, if this means giving Gwen her last hurrah, then so be it. She didn't even get to say goodbye to Rhys. God, she's given up so much; they all have, for him.

Jack watches them, thinking what he's had to give up on this journey.

Happiness: The Doctor.

When he had saluted him at Roald Dahl Plaza last year, he hadn't thought it was goodbye. They promised each other they'd see each other for Christmas. Jack had bought him his present the day he heard the news… They were two sides of the same coin, and nothing was supposed to separate them.

Ianto moves beside him, silently, and grasps his hand. Jack stares into the Welshman's blue eyes, almost trying to find his Doctor reflecting back. Ianto mouths, "I love you," and squeezes his eyes shut, and Jack sees the tears cascading down his cheeks.

He looks up at Gwen, who has the device in her right palm; her left hand is slightly above it, shaking. She screams with pride, "SONTA-HA!"

The Immortal's last thoughts are if this was really the end. If the blast would send his body into a billion pieces in the atmosphere, and if those pieces would eventually fuse together slowly and painfully, like that other time.

Or if this truly was it, the end he'd craved for centuries, so he could be reunited with the one person who understood him in the stars.

Comments

[scifiangel.livejournal.com]

Cool idea. The Doctor always said there was only one set of Time Lords, but Rose proved him wrong in Turn Left. Because that clearly was not the same Doctor laying on that gurney.

[mahmfic.livejournal.com]

thank you for reading my story!

[knm1234.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'd forgotten the TW team dying in Turn Left. Nice little exploration of that scene. x

[mahmfic.livejournal.com]

I just saw season 4 recently (I'm ALWAYS a season behind in Who) so Turn Left is still pretty decently fresh in my mind. I always thought it was interesting that in the Turn Left!verse they die at the Sontaran spaceship and Rose knows their names.

And thank you for reading!

[iamjabberwok.livejournal.com]

Oh this is fantastic! I love this little glimpse into Jack's head in the Turn Left AU. It took me two reads to really get the idea because I'd forgotten that bit in the episode, but it's amazing that in so little space you can say so much. Love it. (and I should have checked the com before I posted to see if someone else had already done this prompt. So sorry, unintentional noob-dom.)

[mahmfic.livejournal.com]

Like I said to a previous commenter, I saw season 4 recently, so Turn Left is still kind of fresh in my head. And the team dying at the Sontaran ship stuck with me.

Thank you for such an amazing review. I was actually worried that Jack wasn't going to be OC. My stories have the tendency to be short but pack a lot of punch (erm does that make any sense). Guess it's just my style.

And it's totally fine that you posted your fic with the same prompt soon after me. In this type of fest it was bound to happen sooner or later. So don't worry! No biggie!

[iamjabberwok.livejournal.com]

No, I think in this situation he'd definitely have the extreme emotions you give him. Not OC at all.

Turn Left was one of my favorite eps in that season. It was so well-written.

[silvermoon-06.livejournal.com]

Oh! Wow! This is so incredibly sad, and so incredibly written! I think you've captured what it would have been like for the Torchwood team on that Sontaran ship, having to do the dirty deed, and sacrifice themselves.

I also love how you delved into Jack's mind, and his feelings about the whole situation! I think you really captured what he would have been thinking, spot on. And, him thinking about the Doctor, and their last meeting, and would he ever get to see him again? And how he'd had to give up happiness, and the Doctor. How heartbreaking.

Him thinking would he come back alive from this one? That was really scary, and so poignant! And so well written. Would he? Yeah, that part gave me chills.

This last line really brought tears to my eyes, it was so beautiful, and so sad:

Or if this truly was it, the end he'd craved for centuries, so he could be reunited with the one person who understood him in the stars


This was brilliant, hon. You did a fantastic job with this. I loved it.:D Thanks so much. I've saved it to my memories. :D

[ana-rpm.livejournal.com]

Oh, this was beautiful. :)

[digitalada.livejournal.com]

That was beautiful and so sad. I really liked this glimpse into Jack's head when he and the Torchwood team were on the suicide mission. The Turn Left Au episode really provides good material for angst.