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wintercompanion2007-08-12 04:23 am
Remembering Darkness
Title: Remembering Darkness
Author/Artist/Vidder: amythest_n_ice
Prompt(s) Used: Jack recovers his two years by accident, it was him, not the Doctor who destroyed Gallifrey. How does Jack react? How does Ten react?
Rating: 15
Spoilers/Warnings: Nothing that I can see.
Summary: Jack and the Doctor encounter an alien creature.
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The Doctor struggled against his chains as in the far corner of the cell the glowing, violet cloud of gas closed on Jack.
“Leave him alone.” He screamed, uncaring of the blood that oozed from where the cuffs cut into his wrists.
“Now why would we want to do that? I sense such exquisite pain hidden deep in his mind. I think we’ll enjoy bringing these memories to light.” The dry voice, reminiscent of the creaking of a haunted house door sounded from the thick shadows to the right of the room.
“No.” The Doctor felt a sick swell of horror.
He knew they were after the memories the Time Agency had locked away, and while he had no idea what those blocks hid, he knew that the one time he had tried to take them down, he had felt such misery and bitter agony behind them that he wasn’t sure Jack’s mind would survive the memories. He shuddered at the thought of the immortal spending eternity being driven insane by what was hidden there.
“Let him be,” he snarled, yanking on the chains again.
“I think not, such beautiful pain, and such a long lifespan. I cannot even see where he ends. He will provide sustenance for a very long time.”
The owner of the voice finally stepped from the shadows, revealing a gaunt figure, tall and skeletal. Ashen, paper thin skin stretched over the long bones. He shuffled over, skirting the gas cloud to stand just to the left of Jack. Thin fingers reached out toward his face, and Jack jerked his head back.
“Foolish child. It is not my touch you need to fear,” he said, leaning close to Jack’s ear, even as Jack tried to lean away to the fullest extent of his chains. The being smirked, and moved to stand just out of the Doctor’s reach.
“I think you’ll enjoy this. One of the effects of the psi-vore’s initial connection, it broadcasts the memories it finds,” he said conversationally, then glided over to a padded chair in another corner. This was always his favorite bit.
“Take him,” he barked at the psi-vore as soon as he was comfortable, watching with his eyes alight with anticipation as his pet dived in to surround Jack.
The Doctor was aware of flashes of memory, impressions of light, and color and feeling as the creature ploughed through Jack’s mind, seeking the dark memories its master wanted. The Doctor knew the moment it had found them, as Jack screamed, and the world seemed to fall away.
xx
Captain Jack Harkness helped the Doctor drag Fitz back to the TARDIS. His stark black Time Agency uniform, the Doctor’s navy velvet frock coat and Fitz’s scuffed leather jacket were all covered in ash from the fires the Daleks had started when they launched their offensive. Fitz was deadweight in their grips, and Jack wasn’t sure he was even still alive, a fear he could see reflected in the Time Lord’s eyes when he glanced over.
“This is it, isn’t it?” He panted as the TARDIS came in sight. They dodged a couple of charred corpses, and Jack made a conscious effort not to see the Time Agency insignia on what was left of the clothing.
“Yes. I…I’m sorry there’s no time to take you to safety, Captain.”
“Hey, I signed up for this Doctor, the Agents that came here all knew what we were getting into.”
They reached the TARDIS, the incongruous blue box nestled against a rocky crag out of sight, and Jack took Fitz’s weight while the Doctor opened the door.
Jack took one last look back over his shoulder before he dragged Fitz inside, watching as the Daleks breached the citadel, feeling his heart breaking. Two years, he had been on Gallifrey, two years in this war trying to stop the Daleks making it here, and they had failed, Gallifrey was falling to the worst enemy he had ever known. He pulled Fitz into the TARDIS, slamming the door shut with his foot and lowering the younger man to the deck.
“Is he alive?” The Doctor called over his shoulder as he frantically threw switches on the console. Jack pressed his fingers to the pulse point on Fitz’s throat, and bit back tears, there was no time to mourn now. He closed the vacant blue eyes, and yanked his uniform jacket off to cover Fitz’s face.
“I’m sorry,” he said simply as he moved up beside the Doctor at the console.
The Doctor’s long fingers whitened briefly around the lever he was holding, and Jack was sure he heard a choked off sob, then the velvet clad shoulders straightened and the Time Lord took a deep breath.
“We have a job to do,” he said, his voice almost steady. He pulled the last lever, dematerializing them for the short hop into orbit.
Jack swore softly when the Doctor activated the screen, showing them space around Gallifrey. Hundreds of Dalek ships surrounded the planet, raining down destruction from above.
“What now?” Jack asked, looking at the screen in horror.
“Now, we do what we have to do to end this once and for all.”
Jack glanced over and saw tears falling unnoticed from the other man’s eyes. He had heard rumors about the last resort, what would be done if the Daleks reached Gallifrey, and now he knew that whatever whisperings he had heard, the reality was much, much worse.
The Doctor slid open a hatch in one of the roundels, revealing a small sphere with white lights running around it in sequence. There was a tiny button recessed in the front of it.
“What is that?”
“The end of everything,” the Doctor said softly, distantly, his agile fingers lightly caressing the skin of the sphere.
In the next instant, everything went to hell as something hit the TARDIS, and Jack and the Doctor were thrown across the console room, sparks flying overhead. They hit the far wall and darkness swallowed Jack.
Jack didn’t know how long he had been out, but when he opened his eyes, the room was lit only with the blood red secondary lighting, and there were small flames still flickering on the console.
“Doctor?” He coughed, pulling himself over to where the Time Lord lay crumpled.
Gently easing the Doctor onto his back, he realized that he wasn’t going to be coming round in a hurry. There was a deep gash over his eye, blood matting the chestnut curls and still running sluggishly from the cut.
Jack forced himself to his feet and over to the console. The screen showed that the Dalek fleet was descending toward the planet now, and Jack knew he didn’t have a choice. He staggered across the dimly lit console room to the hatch the Doctor had revealed, looking at the innocuous little globe inside.
“Goddess, forgive me.” He whispered, reaching out to take the globe.
It felt insignificant as it nestled in the palm of his hand, not at all like it could end a war. He ran his thumb over the cool metal until he reached the trigger, and squeezed.
He leaned against the wall, the sphere still tight in his hand as he watched the screen, watching the corona of white energy pulse out from the TARDIS, watching the most powerful weapon ever created twist and change all of time and space, ending the Time War by destroying every trace of both sides.
Jack crumpled to lean against the console, staring blankly at the screen. He had just wiped out two whole civilizations, along with however many others got in the way.
xx
That was Jack’s last memory as the darkness swept his mind, but the Doctor remembered the rest of it now. He remembered regaining consciousness and finding Jack catatonic against the console, the temporal bomb held tightly in his hand. He remembered prying it from the rigid fingers and throwing it to the side. He remembered forcing back the regeneration that was approaching long enough to get Jack to the Agency and tell them to wipe everything connected with the time war from his mind if they wanted him to ever function again.
Those newly awakened memories slotted in with those that had always been there, waking from his regeneration with the temporal bomb close to his hand, and assuming he had used it as he was meant to. Burying Fitz, and mourning him, along with countless billion others.
Tears streaked the Doctor’s face as he looked across the cell at Jack. The young immortal hung limp in his chains, and the Doctor knew he was perilously close to losing him once more to the catatonia. He needed to get to him, to bring him out of it, but the chains were as tight as ever. The purple pet left Jack and went to its master as the door burst inwards, and planetary security burst in, followed by a worried looking Martha. She looked from one to the other of them, assessing, then she started toward the limp Jack.
“No, Martha, don’t touch him. Get me out of these damn chains.” He yelled as she reached out, struggling against his restraints. As the security men restrained their captor, one used a universal key to release the locks to his chains, and the Doctor darted over to Jack.
As soon as he was within a foot of Jack, he knew he had been right to stop anyone touching him. His shields had been stripped away, and his mind was open, raw. He ever so gently extended his own barriers around Jack’s mind, before slipping his arms around him supporting him so that they could release his chains. As soon as Jack slumped against him, he sank to the floor with him, cradling him against his chest, rocking him gently.
“Come on Jack, you’re safe now. Stay with me Jack.” He whispered into his ear, stroking soft, dark hair over and over.
*I’m sorry, so sorry, hates me now, never forgive me* Jack’s mental mantra was so faint that the Doctor could barely hear it, even connected as he was right now.
The Doctor bowed his head, feeling Jack’s self loathing, the fear that the Doctor would abandon him again for something so much worse than just being immortal, and he knew what he had to do to bring him back. Focusing, he pushed his feelings for Jack into the younger man’s mind. Letting him feel the love that the Doctor felt for him, his gratitude that Jack had forgiven him for abandoning him, the joy he felt when Jack decided to come with him again.
“I love you.” He whispered aloud, kissing the other man’s forehead gently.
Jack shuddered once, then started to cry, harsh sobs wracking his body.
“Oh, my poor, sweet Jack. Let’s get you back to the TARDIS,” he said softly, and rose with Jack cradled easily in his arms.
“What’s wrong with him?” Martha asked, looking at the destroyed man in the Doctor’s arms.
“Not now Martha, maybe never,” the Doctor said in a warning tone as he carried Jack from the cell.
It was late in the night, in TARDIS terms, when Martha slipped into the med bay with a mug of tea. She handed it to the Doctor, and nodded at the still figure in the bed.
“How is he?”
“Physically, fine. Mentally, not so sure.” The Doctor sipped the tea, then put the mug aside as Jack stirred and whimpered. He grabbed the younger man’s hand and stroked his forearm soothingly.
“How can you bear to touch me?” Jack’s voice was cracked, weak, and full of self loathing. The unexpected question made the Doctor and Martha jump.
“I love you Jack.”
“After what I did? You can’t love a monster like me.”
“You are NOT a monster Jack. You did what had to be done, you know that.”
“Then left you carrying the guilt all this time.”
“Jack, I wish I had done it. I would rather have done it myself, than have ever had this pain anywhere near you.” The Doctor stroked the warm, smooth skin of Jack’s arm for a moment, then tentatively made a suggestion.
“I can take the memory again Jack, send it back from the abyss they dragged it from.” He offered.
“No.” Jack said, surprising the Doctor.
“Why?”
“Because this way it can’t be used against me again.”
“Are you sure? The TARDIS and I can probably erase it completely, between us.”
“No. I…. they should be remembered by as many people as possible. The people who died not knowing why, the people who died fighting for the freedom of others. Fitz.”
“My brave Jack.”
“Yours?” Jack asked, one eyebrow raising slightly.
“Yes, if you want
“I wanted you from the first moment I set eyes on you, all velvet and floppy curls.” Jack smiled.
Martha slipped from the room as the Doctor leaned over to kiss Jack sweetly on the lips. He still had a long way to go, and the Doctor suspected that both of them would be having nightmares for some time to come, but they would face it together.
The End.
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Lovely take on this. I like the fact the Doctor knew jack before and that he has always been a hero...
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*spends a good ten minutes with happy visuals of 10 in chains*
“I love you.” He whispered aloud, kissing the other man’s forehead gently.
I can so picture him doing that.
Beautiful (:
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I wish he really would admit he loves Jack, *scowls at RTD*
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I liked this look into what could have happened. Nicely done. :)
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